In His Pursuit

Whenever I am out of my workspace, all my thoughts are on whack and excited to write but now that I am ready to record them all, it's now a blankspace. So, I will try to juice out my ideas now while I have time. I will start with what I learned from a book I was reading during the holidays, The Crazy Love by Francis Chan. New year seems to make people new. Like, almost all want to be a better version of themselves. After all, it's the best time to start anew. Whatever failures that you don't want to remember from the past year seems like a really long time ago. It feels like it is a clean slate. My one takeaway that I will apply from the book is to live my life day by day, consistently and see if my goal was achieved. We usually make new year resolutions that are too big to do and so we have to make it simple habits to develop so we get there. One of my goals for this year is to get back in being active, eat healthy, be a blessing to others and to grow deeper in my r...

I have never been this challenged in my 10 years  of being with Jesus. I last experienced this much breaking in 2009. I know, I know, it was my fault. This year, was a painful year of break ups, yes, a lot of reltionships neglected because of some priorities I did not juggle well. I was in pain starting January up until today so that marks its one year. I know again that it dated back last December when I didn’t listen to the Lord’s proddings to let go of a man that I like. I tried to justify it to my God and say, we aren’t doing anything wrong naman. And God has given us liberty to choose. BUT THEN AGAIN, WE CANNOT CHOOSE THE CONSEQUENCES OF OUR ACTIONS AND NOW, I AM REAPING IT. By the start of 2020, even today as I speak, I wanted to just have Jesus. Pero ang hirap. HAHA. My flesh is overtaking many times. I would justify again that it is because I just want to be myself and don’t want to pretend. But again, I know that I should die to myself and live for Jesus lang. To depend...

This is what happened in the Dumaguete Mission Trip. There really is blessing in obedience. I remember the time when God called me to go full-time in the ministry but that was six years ago. I hate it when my stories of God's faithfulness do not multiply because maybe I am not being sensitive to His voice.  Will share with you how tough this year has been for me.  2019 started out pretty exciting for me. Knowing that God still wants me to serve Him full-time in the ministry, I wanted to study to better equip myself and help in the training and discipling of the next generation of leaders of this country. I enjoyed learning how to teach which is ironic because I do not have the gift of it. I do not want children in the first place but I want to homeschool my future children.  February of this year, was a big adjustment for me but I managed to serve God after God telling me that His grace is sufficient for me for His power is made perfect in weakness. But...

It's been a month since I was very thirsty of the love of this world. It still comes sometimes. Like last night. I was very emotional thinking about the pain I have gone through this year. But, in the morning, truly joy comes in. Really praying and surrendering all your pains and disappointments to the Lord and allowing Him to comfort you. I am doing this now while in the office on my sabbath day so I would not have to watch Ang Probinsyano haha jk but personally, I am truly praising God for allowing me to book another flight to Dumaguete to just rest and get off the Manila traffic and just spend time with my mom. Praying that I get to pray when we are there and not to thirst for love that doesn't quench. I know that I am not where God wants me to be. I am pushing for what I want. Cause my whole life, I feel like I am considering others in my decisions and this time, I would want to be honest with God to do things on my own. But I know there is emptiness. I know that this ...

When you do the right things for others yet it is not appreciated. I believed so many lies of satan with just 24 hours after knowing how filled you are. Have you experienced that? One minute you are filled the second to it you are totally controlled by yourself and I call this being controlled by the evil knowing that we are spiritual beings. First, when everybody have deserted you, know that God is near. When you feel like the whole world has gone against you, that is not true. When the people that you have helped do not reciprocate it. Sharing with you an excerpt from The Bondage Breaker of Neil T. Anderson that I read after feeling so down. Sacrifice the Temporal to Gain the Eternal Possibly the greatest sign of spiritual maturity is the ability to postpone rewards. Hebrews 11:24-26 says: "By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter; choosing rather to endure ill-treatment with the people of God than to enjoy the pa...

So, I'll be back in sharing in this blog what I am learning from the Lord. I wanted to post my draft re the Philippine elections but I know that it would not please the Lord and might hurt people with how I constructed it so I am making a new one now that I am calmed down from the results. It is hard to handle extreme joy of Vico Sotto, our city's new mayor, winning and seeing the senatorial race filled with the senators that I am not sang-ayon to be in the legislative body and that is extreme sadness. I pity myself and this nation. What brought us here? I would rant on twitter my disappointment and my joy after a while. Baka nga mabaliw na ako neto e. Pero with this, I wanted to get to know God more. I wanted to come to the Lord. I wanted to just tell God how I feel. How disappointed I am. How I feel helpless. That I cannot do anything. That I wanted to do another job that would be more significant. God showed me how dumi my heart is again. How selfish I am. How proud I...

This was a sun down after running. Saw the clear skies and it made me relax. I don't know if I actually wrote about something on my love life here in this blog. But, I just want to share some points I've learned from my struggles recently. First, humility before God. Knowing that everything is the Lord's and everything comes from Him. Second, surrender your desires to an all-knowing and all-powerful God. Third, I need to seek God for His leading to be in the center of His good, acceptable and perfect will. Fourth, be accountable to God and fear Him. To not hurt Him. Fifth, develop yourself in being diligent. AND SO I THOUGHT I KNEW THINGS ALREADY. I drafted this blog last 11/11/18 and today is 2/28/2019. I have been down with flu and I thought that I am also down emotionally and that is worse than being down physically. A lot has happened since and I was listening to a pastor on… 'How do you kn...