Not A Sacrifice

This is what happened in the Dumaguete Mission Trip.

There really is blessing in obedience. I remember the time when God called me to go full-time in the ministry but that was six years ago. I hate it when my stories of God's faithfulness do not multiply because maybe I am not being sensitive to His voice. 

Will share with you how tough this year has been for me. 

2019 started out pretty exciting for me. Knowing that God still wants me to serve Him full-time in the ministry, I wanted to study to better equip myself and help in the training and discipling of the next generation of leaders of this country. I enjoyed learning how to teach which is ironic because I do not have the gift of it. I do not want children in the first place but I want to homeschool my future children. 

February of this year, was a big adjustment for me but I managed to serve God after God telling me that His grace is sufficient for me for His power is made perfect in weakness. But still, there was pain, even up until today. Whenever I would remember how I have hurt my God and how that relationship isn't the same as before, it pains me to know why did I even do that? Such selfishness of mine. 

Reminding myself of God's grace everyday that I don't deserve anything makes my heart okay.

March of this year, while I continue the ministry, made myself busy in building new teammates in Christ through sports. 

Sana sports game na lang ang life, na pwedeng mag-time out pag pagod ka na, pwedeng magpa-sub at malamang, matatapos din ang laro pero ang totoo, bukas, may training ulit at sa makalawa ay may laro ulit. 

Pero after a while, I realized that I was running on empty by June. I am thankful for an opportunity to go to another place and minister. That is my recharging pill everytime I would become weary in the ministry because I get to experience God in a whole lot of new level and way as I am encouraged equally by the people who walk with God in a different context as I am. 

I know it was God's call for me to go to Dumaguete last July to equip the leaders of Elevate Duma and Cebu. But what I didn't actually saw at first was that God has blessed us through the team in the local church. I was truly encouraged by all of their missionaries who gave their lives to the Lord despite of the simpleness of the ministry. I was reminded to go back to the gospel. To the heart of it all. 

Jesus.

I am encouraged to go back and rest in the Lord. That this mission is something that isn't for this world alone but for eternity. That it is a privilege to team up with the Lord. That it is always a joy to see lives changed in the campuses and beyond. 

Today, it is painful to see your family not as close as before because of busyness of life. Ministry not as vibrant as it was before. Maybe there needs to be changed. Maybe my heart needs to take a whole lot of pruning and humbling to do. And to empty myself of myself and have Him alone.

 I was reminded of how Jesus left the throne to bring us back to relationship with our Heavenly Father. I was reminded of His love for us. Who am I not to obey God's plan of saving as much. How will my life look like if I am just thinking less of myself. Our God is Sovereign. If He has allowed us to go through the pains of this 2019, there will be more, but coming back to God, despite of the pain is worth it. If maeexperience naman natin si God deeper than ever before, it won't compare to the joy that this world can offer. Hindi sacrifice 'to, pero privilege. Sana di ko kainin ang sinabi ko. HAHA

Praying that you, reader of this blog get to experience Him in your life as well. 

In His Pursuit,

Michelle Aquino