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Practice doesn’t make perfect… in relationships. I think every single person who has fallen to the trap of satan (I intended not to make it capital letter) that we have to try things to know what we can improve on in the future, which gives away part of us in waste in the process. All the people who have fallen to the trap would say “uhhh how I wish I could go back in that time and yell at my younger self and say, stop it, Michelle Aquino, just stop.”
When we aren’t convinced of God’s goodness, we will not follow His design. When we don’t trust God’s goodness, we won’t listen to His instructions. When we doubt that all He wants for us is the best, we will not obey Him and thus suffer unnecessary pains. We are free to choose, but we cannot escape the consequences of our actions.
In lawn tennis, volleyball or any other sport that gives the opponent the score when we make a mistake, they would always say, go for the next point. When we sin, humble ourselves, admit that we’ve sinned, ask for forgiveness, and put our faith in God’s promise that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us of all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). There will be times that you will feel that you’re not forgiven but don’t fall to the trap, make your train be pulled by God’s truth and putting your faith on that and feelings will follow. Feelings are not reliable. Know the truth. Move on and don’t go back to that sin ever again because if you do, most of the time it will worse than before.
Matthew 26 (Judas and Peter’s betrayal): We can either follow Judas’ who hanged himself because of probably guilt of what he did to Jesus or we can follow Peter’s example who repented and decided to follow Jesus.
We are all unworthy of Jesus’ death on the cross but He surrendered to the will of the Father because of His love for us and because He wants to bring us to eternity.
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| The Chinese character for forgiveness. Being given by higher person. |
Leviticus 16:30; Leviticus 13, 14, 15, 18; Psalm 65:3
I never understood the cross until last week. Or prolly I have more to know about it and will never grasp it fully in this lifetime.
I'm not talking about crossfit. But it can be. I realized that my sins put Jesus on the cross which I should be the one who must suffer. I should be the one to die on the cross but even I am not fit to pay the penalty of my sins. I cannot pay for the penalty of my sins.
I've been guilt-tripped (by satan) in the past few days and/or since I've committed a very bad sin towards God. Though I know that God has forgiven me already 2000+ years ago when he died on the cross (and accepted Jesus as my lord and Savior) it just doesn't feel like I was forgiven.
I feel so hypocrite because I don’t do what I teach. (So, I just talked to God in prayer and ask for forgiveness.) I teach my dgroup that God's forgiveness is like a train. Our faith in God's worth which is the truth is what will pull the train and that must settle it. Feelings will come, but if they won't, there's no problem because the truth is God has forgiven me already. 1 John 1:9
Though my devotions were bombarded by forgiveness in a time, there were also times when I just didn't hear from the Lord. It was because I wasn’t ready.
I went to different levels. Some times, I feel like I just wanted it, some times I felt like it was all my fault and I wanted to see Jesus already, I wanted to die in a sense feeling that my life was a waste, some times I felt like I have no face to show others. I felt so unclean but most of all, I was so ashamed of ruining another person who loves the Lord.
The Lord reminded me that He is more important. Hey Michelle, you sinned against Me. I was so preoccupied on what other people will say about me and that was prideful of me. I just thought of my clean slate stained. I made a bigger mistake and that is breaking God’s heart.
Self-righteous. I always wanted to be the good girl. The girl whom everybody would look up to. The girl who will speak about purity with a pure record.
Now, I want to truly point that my purity comes from Him alone. From His forgiveness. Turning my mess into His rest.
We are holy because we’re children of God and we must live it out. We should stop striving on our own because we will fail but the Holy Spirit will enable us.
What I’m learning now. The woman who poured her perfume to Jesus’ feet with her hair sort of experienced. It is just now that that sinked in to me. That the greater the sins God has forgiven, the greater you would love Him. (I’m not saying we should all sin bigtime.) And in my case, God allowed that to happen for me to love Him more and experience His grace more which I really don’t deserve even an inch of it. I saw grace in a different level now. His love that was shown on the cross that tore the veil for us to be able to spend eternity with Him someday. I love You, Jesus! It’s so surreal that a hypocrite, such a mess like me would He call to the ministry. That He still wanted to use me despite my shameful sins. That He loves me and died for me though He knew that I would sin and break His heart. That while at the cross He thought of me, He thought of my sin, the sins that brought Him there, the sins that would bring me to hell the sin that I did for my pleasure which was the displeasure in the Father’s sight but He chose to forgive.
A friend asked a friend what is love, and a friend said, it is showing kindness, patience, and forgiveness. That was exactly what Jesus has done for you and for me. He didn’t wait for us to love Him before He loved us. He loved us first, while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. It's not too late to repent.
Dear Lord, thank you so much for your love and forgiveness. Cleanse me and help me walk with you moment by moment and please you in my thoughts, words, actions and even eyes. In Jesus' name, Amen.
In His Pursuit,
Please pray for me also in this area of my life. I’m not perfect. Pray that I will always be filled with the Holy Spirit. Do send your prayer requests to: michellleaquino@gmail.com so I can pray for you also. With love, Michelle♥