Big Picture

It is only faith when it involves something that could not be accomplished unless God was the One doing it. –one of the CCF Pastors (Sorry, I can't remember who)

In my 20 years of existence, I never knew how to stop the rain.

I headed to go out of the city for a week. I've been praying for this time alone with God and free myself from the pressure brought by the demands of a fast-paced world in metropolis. I've always wondered why there is somewhat time difference in Manila compared to the province (It’s like the time is very slow but in reality, wala talagang significant difference.). It’s just the same, people both work, eat, drink, watch TV. I think it’s the priority. I’m going back to what’s important.

Sun is never absent. I mean, it doesn't go away when it’s raining. It’s just behind the clouds or should I say the clouds are just hampering the rays of the sun to shine.

I am very disappointed and am asking God, why… again? It’s been a tough decision for me to obey God’s leading for my future. And the reason I get out of the urban is for me to be able to do my application form. It was all for the LORD. I wanted to focus on Him and wanted to help my Lola who’s nursing a cough. And then, the news that backfired on me was that my mom had vertigo (my mom never had that, just now.), the outside of our house is under water and I've no way to go out of the bucolic because of the rain, not mentioning the non-stop monsoon rain. My plans may have been thwarted and cannot go back sooner to the city, and the LORD reminded me of Proverbs 19:21 “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.”

I blurted out my nuisance upon God. I cried my feeling of powerlessness. I am too far from my mom whom I want to really be with at the moment especially she’s suffering this illness plus the frailty feeling that I can’t help her at home resulted to me asking God why does this have to happen.

Know that He is God. He knows what He’s doing. He is God. He owes me no explanation. I was reminded by my quiet time that morning in Ezekiel. This constantly appears: “Then you will know that I am the LORD.” (Ezekiel 13:23) It didn’t made sense, or so I thought. The context of the verses where that sentence appears is whenever punishment is given by God and He will say that through those hurtful punishments, they will know that He is God (Ezekiel 23:49 “Yes, you will suffer the full penalty. Then you will know that I am the Sovereign LORD.). I am not saying that the rain is a punishment because in reality, I might just do not know that rain is very important to other people. But while it was raining and while I was pouring upon God, I was asking what the benefits of the rain are? I can’t think of any favor in it, that’s how clouded my mind was because of the circumstance. I slept it over and 20 hours after, I found myself enjoying the every drop of the rain and after I've finished this article, I recognized that because of the rain, I had something to write about.

I still did not understand prior to the two realizations I had and God timely showed me in my morning dev Proverbs 20:24 “The LORD directs our steps, so why understand everything along the way?” It didn’t say that I should just shrug it off and not understand it but at the end I realized that He is God. He owes us no explanation. But we are sure that the time will come when His light will shine brighter than ever because His glory is revealed through Him binding our gash up. (Isaiah 30:26 “The moon will be as bright as the sun, and the sun will be seven times brighter--like the light of seven days in one! So it will be when the LORD begins to heal his people and cure the wounds he gave them.”).

When we are left with nothing, that’s when we’ll see plainly Him being God. Someone once said, when we get to the end of ourselves, that's when we (usually) start going to God.

God comforted me through Luke 21:34 “Watch out! Don’t let your hearts be dulled by the worries of life.” My Lola asked me last Sunday when it was raining pretty hard and we have to take the road that’s very off-road; thrilling trip to the local church. “(In Kapampangan) Di ka ba natatakot sa daan?” I said confidently, hindi. Alam ko naman na pupunta ako sa langit (with Jesus) pag namatay ako.” I made a mountain out of a molehill. I won’t probably die if I fell off the road and the fishpond catches me, I think I would have a great time swimming with the tilapias and bangus under water and probably getting some sugpo and alimango to take home. I’m happy my Lola laughed and she agreed (agreed with my first statement.).

Have faith in God. We may not see the quick change in our situation but our hearts learned how to depend and wait upon Him. I heard someone say, God isn't concerned on our convenience He is more concerned on our character. How we respond in these hard, helpless times defines how much we trust Him.

My first day in Pampanga, I felt the urge to wash the dishes but as it turned out to be a fun obedience to the LORD, mosquitoes started to make me their dinner. I prayed but still the mosquitoes didn't go away. We don’t have anything that will make them go since those flying objects are identified here and they’re normal at least at night. I praise God I was able to finish cleaning the dishes but I was tempted to tell God “I’m obeying you and this is what I get?” What I did was to get Pajamas and socks for me to be covered. Weird-looking as I was, I don’t care. Motion before emotion. Do what you can control to make the situation better rather than complaining.

How should I overstate this? I always say that I won’t be able to do anything about it, so why worry? Don’t take this wrongly. Not worrying is not complacency and ‘walang pake’. Not worrying is giving it all up to the One who’s in control of everything and trusting Him that He can take care of us and that He can handle it.

Trust God. Count your blessings. Don’t worry, it won’t add a single moment in your life (Matthew 6:27). Don’t focus on the unchanging circumstance rather, focus on the unchanging God (Ezekiel 24:14). Be founded on who He is and the fact (Luke 21:33 “Heaven and earth will disappear but His words will never disappear.”) that He loves you no matter what happens. Romans 8:35–39 "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written, "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

We are mere humans who cannot see the big picture. But it always comforts me when I think that I have a living God, a Father who’ll not forsake and leave us. It may not change the circumstance but it changes the stance of my mind. Praise God that we don’t have to worry. He thinks of you. He thinks of your safety more than anyone else could do.

As how Tony Dungy, an NFL champion coach, puts it from his book: Quiet Strength, A Memoir “In the process (of where to be a head coach), I had once again learned a valuable lesson. God’s plans don’t always follow human logic. I was finally a head coach, but it had happened in a setting and through a process that had made me believe I had no chance. We often can’t see what God is doing in our lives, but God sees the whole picture and His plan for us clearly.” He was asked to join the team where media had to wait outside a restaurant where they were for them to get exclusive news about him being the new head coach back then of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Isn't it exciting? God passes out the things wherein it isn’t what’s best for us because He just wants what is best for us. We have no idea what’s in God’s head now but for sure it’ll be for your good. He loves you, anyway. In this rainy season I was marveling on how God makes the birds survive the weather, how much more us? “And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.” (Luke 12:7)

I was also very downhearted that a lot of people died in the clash of the two marine vessels. God reminded me, how much more I, who created those people, how much more do I love them, Michelle. Sometimes, we just have to be refreshed of God’s truth of how much He loves us and not allow the distress to cloud our clear view of His goodness because His mercies and goodness overflows. It doesn't end. I was rebuked by the verses I read my Lola just days ago Psalm 23 and Ecclesiastes 3. Make God’s truth apply in your hearts now. Don’t belittle the God who died for you, the God who just wanted to save you from the pit. When I thought of why am I suffering? I am serving You. I was reminded by Jesus’ death on the cross. Was it comfortable for Him? Was it easy for Him? No, but He did it anyway to obey God the Father and for us to be saved. He can just disappear and don’t do it, but because of His great love for us, He suffered on our behalf. As a follower of Jesus, we have to take our own cross and follow Him daily whether it’s raining or not. It will not be easy, not also hard. It will be impossible but this life that we are living now is God’s. Allow God to work on it. He will enable you.

One thing that is certain, the rain will stop and the sun will rise again soon. I just don’t know when. This situation taught me to trust Him and know fully that He is God and I am not.♡

Prayer: Dear LORD, I am sorry for not trusting in You and for taking my eyes out of You and forgetting Your goodness in my life. Help me to always trust in Your power and to always depend on You on all occasions. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

In His Pursuit,

Michelle Aquino 

Please pray for me also in this area of my life. I’m not perfect. Pray that I will be able to trust God more when rainy season comes. Do send your prayer requests to: michelleaquino13@gmail.com so I can pray for you also. With love, Michelle. ♥